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DE WITT'S ACTING- PLAYS. efe/Xu 

(Number 310 



Tie Bmacl R 



A^ OOM:Er>IETT.A.. 




IN TWO ACTS. 



ALTEEED FKOM A MUSICAL BURLETTA 



By THOMAS HAYNES BAYLY. 



TOGETHER V7ITH 

A deacriptioa of the Costumes— Synopsis of the Piece— Cast of the Cbaracterg 

— Entrances and Exits— Relative Positions of the Performers oc 

the Stage, and the whole of the Stage Business. 




DE WITT, PUBLISHER. 

Ifo, 33 JRo»e Street. 




( m 

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DE WITTS ACTING PLAYS, 



^^ PUa$e notice that nearly all the Comedies, Farces and Comediettas in the foUoicin^ 
^ist ofD-a Witt's Acting Plays" are vei^ suitable for representation in omall Amateur Thea- 
tres and on Parlor Stages, as they need but little extrinsic aid from complicated scenery or 
expensive costumes. Th^y have attained their deseited popularity by their droll situations^ 
excellent plots, great humor and briUiant dialogues, no less than by the fact that they are the 
most perfect in every respect of any edition of plays ever published either in the United States 
or Europe, whether as regards purity of the text, accuracy and fulness of stage directions and 
scenery, or elegance of typography and clearness of printing. 

*** In ordering please copy the figures at the commer,^ement of each piece, which indicate 
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^^" Any of ihe following Plays sent, postage free, on receipt of price — 15 
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jy The figure following the name of the Play denotea the number of 
Acts. The figures in the columns indicate the number of characters — M.male; 
F. female. 



No. 
75. 

114. 
U7. 

93. 

40. 

80. 
19-3. 
16«. 

41. 
141. 

67. 

36. 
i 180. 

70. 
179. 

25. 

24. 



175. 
55. 

65. 

68. 

76. 
149. 
121. 
107. 
152. 

62. 
J 48. 

113. 
1»^. 

?3. 
4. 
22. 
06. 
16. 
68. 
12S. 
7L 



Adrienne, drama, 3 acta 7 

Anything for a Change, comedy, 1 3 
Apple Blossoms, comedy, 3 acta — 7 

Area Belle (The), farce, 1 act 3 

Atchi, comedietta, 1 act 3 

Aunt Charlotte's Maid, farce. 1 act. . 3 
Game of Cards (A), comedietta, 1 3 
Bardell vs. Pickwick, sketch, 1 act. 6 

Beautiful Forever, farce, 1 act 2 

Bells (The), drama, 3 acts 9 

Birthpla-^e of Podgers, farce, 1 act. . 7 

Black Shfc^p, drama, 3 acts 7 

Blow for Blow, drama, 4 acts 11 

Bonnie Fish Wife, farce, 1 act 3 

Breach of Promise,, drama, 2 acts. . 5 
Broken-Hearted Club, comedietta, 1 4 

Cabman, No. 93, farce, 1 act 2 

Caste, comedy, 8 acts 5 

Caught by the Cuff, farce, 1 act 4 

Cast upon the World, drama, 5act8.10 
Catharine Howard, historical play, 

Sacts -v 12 

Charming pair, farce, 1 act. : 4 

Checkmate, comedy, 2 acta 6 

Chevalier de St. George, drama, 3 9 
Chops of the Channel, farce, 1 act. 3 

Clouds, comedy, 4 acts .r . . . 8 

Comical Countess, farce, 1 act 3 

Cupboard Love, farce, 1 act 2 

Cupid's Eye-Glass, comedy, 1 act... 1 

Cup of Tea, comedietta, 1 act 3 

Cut off with a Shilling, comedietta, 

1 act 2 

Cyrill's Success, comedy, 5 acts — 10 
Captain of the Watch (The), come- 
dietta, 1 act 4 

Daddy Gray, drama, 3 acts 8 

Dandelion's Dodges, farce, 1 act — 4 

David Garrick, comedy, 3 acts 8 

Dearest Mamma, comedietta, 1 act, 4 
Dearer than Life, drama, 3 acts — 6 

Deborah (Leah) drama, 3 acts 7 

Deerfoot, farce. 1 act 5 

Doing for ths Best, drama, 2 acts. . 5 
DoUan and Cents, comedy, t acts. . 9 



No. 
21. 

186. 
47. 
13). 
200. 
103. 
9. 

128. 
101. 

99. 
145. 
102. 

88. 

74. 

53. 

73. 



131. 

28. 

J51. 

8. 

180. 

19. 

60. 
187. 
174. 

6*. 
190. 
191. 
197. 

18. 

116. 



159. 
122. 
177. 
100. 
139. 

17. 

86. 

72. 



Dreams, drama, 5 a<;t3 6 

Duchess de la Valliere, play, 5 acts. . 6 

Easy Shaving, farce, 1 act. 5 

Everybody's Friend, comedy, 3 acts. 6 

Estranged, an operetta, 1 act 2 

Faust aod Marguerite, drama, 3 acts, 9 
Fearful Tragedy in the Seven Dials, 

interlude, 1 act 4 

Female Detective, drama, 3 acta 11 

Fernande, drama, 3 acts 11 

Fifth Wheel, comedy, 3 acts 10 

First Love, comedy, 1 act 4 

Foiled, drama, 4 acts r. . 9 

Founded on Facts, farce, 1 act. . . . 4 

Garrick Fever, farce, 1 act 7 

Gertrude's Money Box, farce, 1 act. 4 
Golden Fetter (Fettered), drama, 3 11 
Goose with the Golden Eggs, farce, 

1 act 5 

Go to. Putney, farce. 1 act 4 

Happy Pair, comedietta, 1 act 1 

Hard Case (A), farce, 1 act 2 

Henry Dunbar, drama, 4 acts 10 

Henry, the Fifth, historical play, 5 36 

He'savLunatic, farce, 1 act 3 

Hidden Hand, drama, 4 acts 5 

His Own Enemy, farce, 1 act 4 

Home, comedy, 3 acts .4 

H6us*Srold Fairy, sketch, 1 act 1 

Hunting the Slipper, farce, 1 act. .. . 4 

High C, comedietta, 1 act 4 

Hunchback (The), play, 5 acts 14 

If I Had a Thousand a Year, farce, 

lact 4 

I'm Not Mesilf at All, original Irish ' 

stew, 1 act 3 

In for a Holiday, farce, 1 act 2 

In the Wrong House, farce, 1 act. . . 4 

Isabella Orsiiii, drama, 4 acts 11 

I Sha'l Invite the Major, comedy, 1 4 

Jack Long, drama, 2 acts 9 

Joy is Dangerous, comedy, 2 acts. . . 3 

Kind to a Fault, comedy, 2 acts 6 

Lady of Lyons, play, 5 acta 13 

Lame ^xcuae, farce, 1 act 4 



The Barrack Room, 



A COMEDIETTA 



IN TWO ACTS. 



ALTERED FROM A MUSICAL BURLETTA 



By THOS. HAYNES BAYLY. 



TOGETHER WITH 



A DESCRIPTION OP THE COSTUMES— CAST OP THE CHARACTERS — EN- 
TRANCES AND EXITS — RELATIVE POSITIONS OF THE PERFORM- 
ERS ON THE STAqjg^^|^ffl^lttQ.^HOLE OF THE STAGE 



^^#^ce^viiii«r, ^^^ 






JAN 22 



^>^r«i-_|^*^ 



NEW YORK : 

BE WITT, PUBLISHER, 

No. 33 Rose Street. 

Copyright, 1883, by A. T. B. De Witt. 

\ - 



THE BARRACK ROOM. 

CHAKACTERS. 

Marquis de Cruzac, a returned exile. 

Col. Ferrier, a favorite officer of the Emperor. 

Bernard, a sergeant of the Old Guard ; Ferrier's attendant. 

Captain Valmont, aide to the Emperor. 

Batiste, a domestic. -»q —^ 

Notary. f /T U^ ^ 7 <J 

Clarisse, daughter of the Marquis. ' ' I 

Madame Le Roi, a dressmaker. ]■< / "T; 

— } j? ^^^ 

TIME OF REPRESENTATION— ONE HOUR AND A QUARTER. 



SCENERY. 

Act I. — A handsome sitting-room. 
I Door. I 



Door. 



* *o* 

Mantel with Arm-chair. Table and Chairs. 

Mirror over. 



Door. 



O O 

o o 

oooooooooooooooooooooo 
Act II.— Barrack-room of Officers. 

I Door. I 

* : : • 

Portrait of Emperor 

on the wall. Cupboard. 

: Bed with curtain 

: closing alcove. 

Arms and rV 

uniforms on bench. IJ ' 



o* 

n-RoTi^t, O Table and arm-chair. 

Bench. ^^^^p g^^^j^ 



Door. 



o o 

o * o 

ooooooooooooooooooooooo 



THE BARRACK ROOM. 8 

COSTUMES.— 1810. 

Marquis. — Handsomef-teccd dress. In the first scene a brocaded dressing- 
gown ; changed to a lace coat in subsequent scenes. 

Ferrier.— Dress uniform of the French army. 

Bernard.— Uniform of sergeant of the Old Guard— three chevrons on the 
left arm. 

Captain Vai.mont.— Officer's uniform, with aiguillettes and plumed hat. 

Batiste. — Liveries. 

Notary.— Black suit, silk stockings, shoe-buckles, silk gown. 

Clarisse.— First scene, walking dress, hat and feather; after, a white satin 
dress, richly trimmed; jev/els. 



PROPERTIES. 

First Act.— A suit of livery to be shown ; letters on a tray brought in by ser- 
vant ; portfolio and papers for Notary ; writing materials on table ; papers 
for Valmont ; bandbox for Madame Le Rox. 

Second Act.— Long folded dispatch and letter in same envelope for Bernard 
to hand Ferrier; the cupboard to be filled Avith plates, cups, coffee-pot, etc.; 
writing materials and lighted candle on the table ; last scene, another dispatch 
for Bernard to hand Ferrier. 



EDITORIAL INTRODUCTION. 

This bright and effective little comedy was introduced to us by Ellen Tree 
upon her first visit to this country ; and we can find no record of the part of 
Clarisse having been played by any otner lady. As originally produced in 
L«ndon by Madame Vestris it was as a "Musical Burletta," and no doubt it 
is owing to the fact that important parts interwoven with the action and dia- 
logue of the piece demanded music for their performance that it has fallen so 
entirely out of use. 

Ellen Tree gave it without music. In the present edition the musical pas- 
sages are replaced by dialogue and stage business, and an effort has been made 
to render the dialogue more colloquial than it is in the original. 



SYNOPSIS OF THE COMEDY. 

The Emperor Napoleon, at the height of his power, has recalled from exile 
the Marquis de Cruzac, and restored him his fortune. But the Marquis is 
almost immediately compromised by a conspiracy of his relatives, proofs of 
which have fallen into the Emperor's hands. Under terror of this he is easily 
persuaded to settle one-third of his fortune upon his daughter Clarisse, and 
to consent to her marriage to Col. Ferrier, a favorite and rising officer of the 
Emperor. Clarisse, however, makes a stormy resistance to this ai-bitrary 
disposal of her hand ; but her interviews with Feurier lead to her submission 
to the sentiments of respect, admiration, and finally love, which the young 
officer inspires. Bernard, a soldier of the Old Guard, who has been nurse and 
guardian of Ferrier in his military life, and is now his faithful attendant, 
assists in the conquest of Clarisse"s affections by his narrative of Ferrier's 
career from boyhood, and especially by his account of the act of gallantry on 
the field by which Fekrier won his promotion to colonel. 

The play presents well-defined characters and fine effects of situation, and 
also of costume. The scenes between Ferrier and Clarisse and between 
Clarisse and Bernard tav in a high degree dramatic and effective. 



THE BARRACK ROOM. 



ACT I. 

SCENE. — A chamber in the Makquis' house. 

TJie Marquis is examining a livery which Batiste is showing him. 

Marquis. There, there— that livery will suit mo as Tt-ell as any- 
other ; it is simple enough certainly ;* too simple — how unlike those 
my servants used to wear when last I resided in Paris 1 Batiste, 
you must remember that what I now am I ought to have been during 
the period you have known me in exile. Mine is no sudden eleva- 
tion — I am but restored to the dignity which was mine by birth ; 
forget, therefore, that you have ever seen me in poverty and seclu- 
sion , and act as if you had been accustomed to wait upon a person 
of importance. Leave me. {exit Baptists, l.) After filteen years of 
exile, it is delightful once more to breathe the air of France; and 
Paris is certainly preferable to Coblentz. (Batiste enters with a letter 
on a waite, which he delivers, ami retires) A letter from my cousin 
Vcrtpre. He says Prussia is the seat of war, and prophesies that it 
will be the tomb of the usurper, {looks around suspiciously and in 
alarm) Usurper ! What upon earth makes him write to me so 
unguardedly ? to me, of all people in the world, as if I had not 
suffered enough already ! I declare, I'm all over in a cold per — 111 
go on, however, {reads) "You ought to have received by this 
time, my dear cousin, a list of the persons concerned in our plot ; 
of course your uame is placed high on the list." I'm much obliged 
to them ! — and that list has neverreached me ! Suppo.=e it has fallen 
into the hands of the police ! I, who have been exiled for fifteen 
years, as if /should go and meddle with revolutions ! I've said over 
and over again, I'll never be a party man — and now that fatal list, 
and this letter too ! {tears it vp) I should like to swallow it, but it 
might disagree with me — I hear somebody coming. I'ts got back all 
I wanted, let other people look after their own affairs— here's some- 
body coming, I declare, {puts the paper in his pocket) Who's that ? 

Enter Clarisse, c. from l. 

Clarisse. 'Tis I, papa ; do you want me ? 
Marq. Oh, you, is it V v^'here have you been ? 
Cl\r. I've been to the Tuilleries with my governess. Such a 
crowd, and such dresses ! Oh, I was so surprised. 



THE BARRACK ROOM. *> 

Marq. Ah, child ! Paris is new to you, very — magnificent, no 
doubt. We must all be magnificent now. 

Clar. Magnificent ! I saw nothing magnificent. When you used 
to talk to me of Paris ladies, in that humdrum old house of ours in 
Coblentz, you told me they dressed in hoops and high heads — satins 
that would stand by themselves, if the ladies walked out of them. 
But, dear me, all the ladies I saw were dressed in flimsy paltry mus- 
lins, and pokey little bonnets, with their hair so plain ! and then the 
officers— oh, I'm in such a pjission ! — a group of them stood at the 
Tuilkries gate, and made such remarks about me as I passed, that I 
could not lielp saying in their hearing, that if that was the way they 
treated gentlewomen, it was plain that our kings had ruled better 
than any emperor was ever likely to do. 

]\Iarq. You made that remark ? 

Clar. Yes, papa— out loud. 

]\Iarq. Dear me ! out loud ? in their hearing ? I trust not in their 
hearing ? 

Clar. Oh, yes. I took very good care of that. 

Marq, Was there ever so unfortunate a man ! Every one con- 
spires to put me in a suspicious light. I. that intended to be so dis- 
creet, and that have such a horror of going back into exile I — how 
can you be so incautious ? 

Clar. Incautious, papa ! I said what I thought. Shall we sub- 
mit to be insulted by the emperor's body guard ? As to exile, for 
my part, I think it would be much better to go back. I'm sure you 
used to say at Coblentz 

Marq. Not the least necessity for repeating in Paris what I used 
to say at Coblentz. 

Clar. Well, can any tiling be more atrocious than his selecting a 
young lady of the highest rank, and marrying her to a man of low 
birth ? 

Marq. Ilush, don't speak so loud. 

Clar. How would you like to see me betrothed to one of the new 
emperor's upstart drum-majors ? 

Mai{Q. What strong expressions you use, Clarisse ! Talk as you 
will, mis=?, I never saw you half so pleased as you were at the review 
yesterday. 

Clar. Pleased i pleased when it was over ; but as to the review, 
all dust and smoke, and firing of horrid guns. 

Marq. Well, then, I confess that / was exceedingly gratified. I 
was presented for the first time to the emperor, and he condescended 
to notice me. 

Clar. Condescended ! 

Marq. He called me by name, and alluded to the restoration of 
my family honors and propert3^ He is a very great man, and has 
discrimination, as his notice of me proved. 

Enter Batiste, c. from l. 

Batiste. May I speak a few words ? 

Marq. This habit of intruding without form is really contrary to 
etiquette ; it was very well at Coblentz, but 

Clar. He seems to have something especial to tell. 

Marq. Has he, indeed ? Well, what is it ? {aside) I tremble in 
every limb. 

Bat. Just now a soldier entered the porter's lodge, and asked 



6 THE BARRACK ROOM. 

a thousand questions about the family, particularly about Miss 
Clarisso. 

Clar. About me ? 

Bat. He was there, miss, as you entered the court-yard just now, 
and hearing that it was you, he looked at you very hard, examining 
you with the greatest attention. 

Marq. My examination will come next ! 

Clar. Well, I never knew anything so odd. 

Bat. When you had passed he went away, and I heard him say 
to himself, "Nothing could be better ; I am quite content." 

Marq. {aside). Content ! He came to make himself acquainted 
with her person ; and now he's looking for me. 

Clar. Content, indeed ! What had the man to be content about? 

Marq. Leave us. {exit Batiste, r.) You see the consequence of 
your unguarded speech. 

Clar. What unguarded speech ? 

Marq. You may well ask, when you utter so many ; but I mean 
what you said about kings and emperors as you passed the officers at 
the Tuilleries gate. I wonder whether I shall have a head on my 
shoulders at this time to-morrow ! — at my time of life to think of 
having my head chopped off ! We are denounced, Clarisse, that's 
evident, and they'll be coming after us directly. 

Clar. Oh, dear me, don't say so, 

Marq. {aside). And that list that is missing, with my name in great 
big letters near the top ! Oh ! 

Enter Batiste, c. from r. 

Bat. Oh, Marquis ! 

Marq. Ah ! come already ? Oh for a trap-door or a chimney 

Bat. The Count de Lancy, the Duke d'Entraigues, the Marquis 
de Vilb'ers, and the Yiscount de Charency are in the salon, 

{Exit Batiste, c. 

Clar. What, our relations ? 

Marq, Bless me ! are you sure it is really they V — not emissaries 
of the government, dressed up to represent — No, no , that's impossi- 
ble. And what can these worthy people be come about ? I can't 
understand it. 

Enter Batiste, c. 

Bat. Captain Yalmont, the first aid-de-camp of the emperor, 
Marq. The aide-de-camp of the emperor ! Oh, he knows all ! 
There's no hope now — he'll walk us off to the guillotine ! 

Enter Captain Yalmont, c. 

Here he is I I — sir — pray sit down, {tlie Marquis is going to fetch a 
chair, Clarisse prevents him. ) 

Clar. {to Batiste). A chair for the gentleman, 

[Batiste brings a chair from c, and exit, l. 

Yalmont. Thank you, madam. Have I the honor of addressing 
the Marquis de Cruzac ? 

Marq. {aside). There's no use in denying it. {aloud) Yes, sir, that 
is my name. 

Yal. The emperor has given me a commission of a most delicate 
nature 



THE BARRJ^CK ROOM. ^ 

Marq. (aside). Yes, yes — to send us off, bag and baggage. 

Val. a commission wliicli it is ditiicult to fulfill, {hoking at his 
icatch) I have but two hours allowed me for its completion, therefore 
you will admit I have not a minute to lose. 

Marq. Two hours !— certainly not. {aside) We can never pack up 
in two hours ; I don't think they mean to kill us. 

Val. You have a daughter, have you not ? (Clarisse retires up r.) 

Marq. Yes, sir. {aside) The cause of all this worry. You hear, 
Clarisse, he's going to quote that abominable speech of yours. 

Yal. She was with you at the review yesterday ? 

Marq. (c). Yes, yes— the same, {aside) Easily identified, and I 
don't mean to deny that she went to the Tuilleries this morning. 
{alond) Here she is, sir. 

Val. (l.). Your most obedient, madam. I have to apologize for 
a question I am about to propose to you. Did you not yesterday 
wear a dress of pink crepe ? 

Clar, (aside). What a very odd question, (aloud) Yes — why ? 

Val. The emperor remarked it. 

Clar. Indeed ! — the emperor ! Well, I must say it is a strange 
compliment to a lady to remark nothing but her dress ! 

Val. The emperor, madam, remarked you, and only mentioned 
the color of your dress that you might be identified. 

Marq. (aside). Identified ! He's coming to the point. How could 
you wear pink crepe ? 

Val. Another person, madam, has accompanied me hither in the 
carriage, and wishes to have an interview with you. 

Clar. An interview with me ? A stranger ! — impossible. 

Marq. (aside). Dear me ! what can this mean ? They've picked 
up the list, I suppose. 

Val. (smiling). Do not be uneasy ; the stranger is Madame Le Roi, 
her majesty's dressmaker, and by her command she has brought you 
as a present the most beautiful dress she ever manufactured. 

Marq. (aside). A dress ! It must be a travelling dress ! — a hint to 
be off. 

Clar. Oh, the emperor didn't approve of my dress, I suppose, 
and sends me a better. Some people thought I looked very well yes- 
terday. 

Val. One so lovely cannot be improved by dress ; it is only as a 
mark of admiration this gift is sent. 

Clar. (aside). After all, it is a great compliment ; I long to look 
at it. (aloiul) It would be uncivil to keep Madame Le Roi waiting. 

Val. She is here, (goes to door l., and shows in Madame Le Roi, 
who crosses the stage to r. by Clarisse.) 

Clar. I fear I have detained you, madame. This way, if you 
please. {^Exit with Madame Le "Roi, r. 

Marq. (who has been inspecting her, aside). Surely that is not an 
emissary of government in disguise ! Perhaps a bandbox full of 
combustibles ! 

Val. You will remain with me, Marquis, if you please ; I have 
something to communicate. 

Marq. (aside). I see it all ; he did not like to arrest me before my 
daughter, so he made use of this ruse to get rid of me, and now I'm 
to be seized and dragged to prison. 

Val. (to Marquis). Excuse me. Marquis ; though I am in your 
house, I must act as if I were at home, {goes to tlie door and says) 
Come in. 



THE BARRACK ROOM. 



Enter Notary, l. 

You will sit at that table, if you please. (Notary sits at table and 
produces papers) Marquis, I trust you will not object to our proceed- 
ing — this is the Imperial Notary. 

Maeq. {aside). Notary ! what does he mean ? He's come to take 
down my confession. 

Val. In the first place, I must request you will give that gentle- 
tleman a list 

Marq. {aside). A list ! — ah, me ! that unfortunate list. 

Val. a list of your daughter's names. 

Marq. My daughter's names ! — Tier name is not on the — hem — I 
beg pardon — yes, her names are Clarisse Carloine de Cruzac. But 
why do you ask ? 

Val. Your fortune, which was confiscated 

Marq. {trembling). Yes, sir. 

Val. And which has been restored to you 

Marq. {aside). Is going again, that's clear. 

Val. Consists, I believe, of six hundred thousand francs ? 

Marq. Precisely. 

Val. {to Notary). You will write down that the Marquis consents 
to give his daughter, Clarisse Caroline de Cruzac, two hundred thou- 
sand francs as her fortune. 

]\Iarq. Iley-day !— two hundred thousand ! {aside) That is making 
free, however. 

Val. He is only drawing up your daughter's marriage settlement. 

Marq. My daughter's marriage settlement ! 

Val. Yes, by order of the emperor — she is to be married this day, 
within two hours ; — nay, we have but one hour and three-quarters. 

Marq. Impossible ! — you jest. I never heard of such thing. 

Val. We never jest with the emperor's name. The four heads of 
your family are now in the house. 

Marq. So they are ; I declare, I quite forgot them. 

Val. They will witness your signature in the next room ; the em- 
peror will then sign the contract, and you will at the same moment 
be made chamberlain. 

Marq. Chamberlain ! What am I to think ? 

Val. You are to think that the emperor will wisely take good care 
that the brave men whom he has rewarded with honorable distinc- 
tions, shall never be looked down upon by the ancient noblesse. Such 
a man will be the husband of your daughter ! 

Marq. The husband I a man of no birth ! 

Val. {laughing at him). No birth 1 Pardon me, if he had not been 
horn, he would not have been here. 

Marq. I am not to be laughed out of my daughter, and my mo- 
ney. It cannot be ; I decide for her. {aside) As the list has not been 
found I may bluster in safety. 

Val. {seriously). You refuse your consent ? 

Marq. {frightened). Hey — why — yes — certainly— yes. I do posi- 
tively refuse my consent — positively. 
Val. I am to report this to the emperor ? 

Marq. To the — the — emperor ? Yes, decidedly. 
Val. Then, perhaps, at the same time, I had better state that had 
all the persons whose names arc on ihis list {taking a paper from his 
pocket) been present to give their consent, you would have been more 
complying. The list is addressed to you. 



THE BAIIIIACK llOOM. 9 

Makq. (aside). Now I am a lost man ! My poor head ! 

Val. Is your decision irrevocable ? 

Marq. Give me a pen — make haste ; I'll sign anything, if my hand 
does not shake too much. But stop ! my daughter — you don't know 
her, sir — she'Jl never consent ; her pride of birth is such that she'll 
never marry a man who is not of an ancient family. 

Val. You do your duty ; I have done mine. We will leave her 
to the solicitations of the gentleman who aspires to the honor of her 
hand. 

Marq. Ah, yes— by-the-bye, I forgot to ask the gentleman's name ; 
he has a name I suppose V 

Val. I am ready to inform you ; it is Ferrier. 

Marq. And who the devil's Ferrier ? I never heard of the fellow 
before. Ferrier ! Ferrier !^I believe my perriwig-maker's name is 
Ferrier. and, if I'm not mistaken, there was a Ferrier who made 
veal patties. 

Val. He is probably by this time in the ante-room. Pardon me, 
I act as if I were in my own house, (rmr/s the bell.) 

Marq. You certainly do, there's no denying it. I suppose I shall 
get used to it in time. 

Enter Batiste, l, 

Val. Tell the gentleman now waiting in the ante-room that the 
Marquis will be delighted to see him. 

Marq. I beg to say 

Val. {to Marquis). Another time, {to Batiste) And then go to 
Miss Clarisse's chamber, and say the Marquis requires her presence 
here directly. [Exit Batiste, r.^ 

Marq. But, sir, I have a great many things to do, and a quantity 
of important business to attend to, and 

Val. (looking at his watch). We've only one hour left. The mar- 
riage once definitely settled, the ceremony can take place in the 
course of the day, and then you will have plenty of leisure for all 
your important business. 

Marq. There never was such conduct ! Allow me, sir 

Val. I really cannot ; you must accompany the Notary into the 
next room. There, now go. 

Marq. But, sir, this precipitation — such conduct is unprecedented. 

Val. Did you wish to see the list again ? This way, if you please. 

[Exeunt Marquis and Notary, r. 
So much for the Marquis. Ah, here is the bridegroom elect ! 

Enter Ferrier, c. 

Ferrier. Well, have you seen her ? Where is she ? what is she 
like ? Is she tall, short, fair, brown, fat, thin, grave, merry, agreea- 
ble, or 

Val. You must judge for yourself. I have not time to answer 
half your questions, no"r have you any time to lose ; she will be here 
in a moment, and you have now less than one hour left. [Exit, l.^ 

Fer. About three-quarters of an hour to win the heart of a girl 
who never saw me, nor heard of me in her life ! I declare, I ought 
to be full of fascination. 

Bernard looks in, l. 

Bernard (entering). Ah, Colonel, there you are 1 



10 THE BARRACK ROOM. 

Fer. You here ! What do you mean by this intrusion ? TVhy 
have you followed me ? 

Ber. I have not followed you in the rear — I marched first. I was 
here before you, 

Fer. If so, you have left my apartments without permission. 

Bbr. Pardon me, Colonel ; for once I did not wait for the word 
of command. But when the General was with you this morning, I 
heard him talk of your marriage ; and was not that enough to raise 
the curiosity of your old nurse ? I heard the name of the lady, and 
I came here in advance to reconnoitre, and give you a hint if I didn't 
like the face of the country ; so I went to the porter's lodge to get 
information out of the gate-keeper, and, as good luck would have it, 
who should come by but the young lady herself. I had such a good 
look at her ! 

Fer. Well ? 

Ber. I give my consent. Oh, she's a beauty, Colonel ! she's a 
beauty ! and she steps out so well, shoulders square to the front — 
and carries her uniform and accoutrements so nattily. She's like — 
let me see 

Fer. Well, what is she like, Bernard ? 

Ber. Like a regiment of the line on a review day, marching — 
marching before the emperor — drums beating and colors flying ! 

Fer. Rather a formidable lady ! 

Ber. All you've now got to do is to make the best of your time, 
and get her to love you. You'll miss me, though, hang me if you wont. 
But 1 can't hold out much longer, and before I'm dropped from the 
rolls I'd like you to have a wife to look after you, and take care of 
you. But isn't she a long time coming ? 

Fer. {carelessly). If it wasn't for disobeying orders I should take 
her delay very easily. But hark ! I hear the rustling of her finery. 
Leave me, Bernard ; I must to tlie siege at once. 

Ber. Well, but — couldn't I stay to put in a word now and then ; 
to fire a shot or two when your battery flags ? — Very well — success 
attend you, Colonel ; you never knocked under yet, and mustn't 
think of it now. {Exit Bernard, l. 

Fer. She is here — I'll retire and watch her unperceived. {retires 

up la.) 

Enter Clarisse, c. from, r., in an elegant white dress. She icallcs and 
poses before the glass on mantel, r. 

Clar. What a lovely dress ! and it fits me to perfection ; — and 
jewels, too !— and all this from the emperor ? What ca7i it mean ? 
I declare, it needs only a veil to make it a dress for a — {checks herself) 
hm !— time enough for that when I've chosen \\ie—{sees Ferrier in 
the glass — starts and turns) A stanger ! — I beg pardon. 

Fer. /should ask pardon, madam — / am the intruder, {aside) She 
is indeed lovely ! {aloud) I believe you were informed that I waited 
here for you ? 

Clar. Oh, yes — now I recollect, they said somebody was here and 
that papa wanted me ; but where is he ? 

Fer. He is with your relations in the next room. 

Clar. {going). Thank you ; I'll join them, — good morning ! 

Fer. I beg your pardon, but I have something of importance to 
communicate to you. 



THE BARRACK ROO^f. 'll 

Clar. Indeed ! well, then— Oh, but I had better ask papa, for he 
may like to hear it, aud 

Fer. I am here to address you with Jiis permission. 

Clar, Oh, very well, {dsidc) How strange this is ! 

Fer. (placex a chair for her). Will you sit down ? 

Clar. {sittincj). Dear, dear, I'm afraid it's a very long story, if 
I've to sit down to hear it. 

Fer. No, I have unfortunately only about half an hour left. 

Clar. Well, now go on — what is it ? 

Fer. To use as few words as possible, the fact is this — I have now 
about half an hour allowed me to see yo\i — to endeavor to jpleaae you 
— and to solicit the honor of your hand. 

Clar. {starting up). Good gracious ! I wish papa were here ; you 
frighten me out of my wits. 

Fer. {rising). What I have told you is the fact — that you should 
be surprised is natural, but it is no less true than strange. Half an 
hour for the whole course of my wooing ! 

Clar. Wooing, sir ? I don't approve of the expression — you are 
jesting, sir — I am not to be insulted ! 

Fer. Do me the favor to sit down for five minutes, and I'll ex- 
plain all. 

Clar. {sitting). Five minutes — very well— there'll be only twenty 
minutes left then, remember that. 

Fer. {sitting). Yesterday, madam, after the review, the emperor 
called me to him — " Ferrier," said he, "you are one of the youngest 
aud bravest of my officers, but you've no money " 

Clar. Well, sir, you knew that before, I suppose, and what is 
that to me ? — I don't doubt it's quite true. 

Fer. " I have this day heard of a wife who will suit you— she is 
young and beautiful " — this, madam, does concern you. 

Clar. Go on, sir. 

Fer. "Her fortune is large " 

Clar. Oh ! you are candid to mention that. 

Fer. I quote the emperor's words— " I shall to-morrow propose 
the marriage to her father ; he will accede to it at once ; and by this 
lime to-morrow you shall positively be man and wife ! " 

Clar. I'm petrified with amazement ! {rising.) 

Fer. I was so amazed myself I could make no reply — I was igno- 
rant to whom I was to be united, and I heard no more about it un- 
til this morning when an aide-de-camp brought me all the papers 
requisite for the contract — it then appeared to me like a dream, but 
now that I gaze upon you, I feel it is a dejighful reality. 

Clar. And in obedience to orders you are now come ? 

Fer. Obedience to orders is a soldier's duty. 

Clar. {impatientlii). Oh, dear me, I see it all — the soldier's ques- 
tions in the porter's lodge ! — the visit of that aide-de-camp— the 
present of this dress— and of our relations all calling together — 
it is all in preparation for a marriage — a marriage, about which I 
have not even been consulted— and, above all, you— you, sir — yoii, of 
all the people in the world — you have been selected for my husband ! 
And, no doubt, you all supposed that I would tamely acquiesce in 
the arrangement — /, Clarisse de Cruzac, heiress to one of the oldest 
families in France— without a murmur — without a remonstrance — 
marry a soldier whom nobody knows ! I am sorry to be rude, sir, 
very sorry, — but circumstances oblige me, and I now distinctly re- 
fuse you — do you hear ? I refuse you, — let there be no mistake, — 



13 THE BARRACK ROOM. 

irrevocably, and without reservation, I refuse you — so never let me 
see your face again ! (turns rapidly up R.) 

Fer. But the emperor 

Clar. (passionately). If that great chair was the emperor, and lie 
stood there shaking his head at me, and bidding me marry you, I'd 
say no — no — no — no — as long as I'd breath to utter the word ! 

Fer. (aside). Charming, I like her spirit. 

Clar. Pardon me. sir, I have expressed myself strongly — but 
really, if you consider my situation, you cannot wonder at my 
warmth ; you act in obedience to orders, and to you, personally, I 
feel no resentment. 

Fer. I do not wonder at your warmth, and I rejoice at your re- 
fusal — I would not have had you accept me for the world. 

Clar. (surprised). Ah, — very well, — that's quite right. 

Fer. At first, I expected to be refused. At fird, indeed, though 
I should have rained my rank in the army by doing so, I should wy- 
.se?/" have at once refused to accede to the marriage, had I not felt 
convinced that you would have too much delicacy, too much good 
feeling, to accept a husband under such circumstances. 

Clar. Well, now, I like you for saying that— it was kind, it was 
only doing me justice— in fact, then you yourself approve of my re- 
jection ? 

Fer. Decidedly. 

Clar. That's right, then we really are agreed upon one point — we 
refuse each other. I long to let the emperor know it. 

Fer. You must write to him. 

Clar. I can't do any such thing — such an odd subject to write 
about ! — besides, I never wrote to an emperor in my life. 

Feb. You must do so — and immediately. 

Clar. Well, if I must — (goes to tabU and takes pen) you must tell 
me what to say. 

Fer. Write, that Colonel Ferrier, in consequence of the orders he 
had received 

Clar. Colonel Ferrier — oh, you are a colonel! I did not know you 
were Colonel Ferrier ! 

Fer. Yes, I am, madam. 

Clar. Dear me ! I've heard of you 1 — But I forget — well ? 

Fer. (dictating). In consequence of the orders he received, has 
presented himself to you. to say that he was without family — with- 
out fortune, — and that the only papers on which his name is regis- 
tered are the bulletins which have recorded his humble efforts in the 
service of his country. 

Clar. Then you have no noble relatives ? (aside) I declare that's 
a great pity, (aloud) Go on, sir. 

Fer. You will then state the deficiencies and imperfections which 
have suggested your refusal. The emperor will liy into a rage, but 
as he cannot revenge himself upon you. all will be forgotten to-mor- 
row.— Why don't you finish the letter ? 

Clar. (pettishly). Well— I— I— I've begun— and I shall finish it all 
in good time— I've said " Sire,"— and told him that Colonel— what is 
your name ? 

Fer. Ferrier. 

Clar. Ferrier — yes — (writing) there — but then I — I 

Fer. What is the matter ? 

Clar. Why, it's such a disagreeable thing to abuse a person who 
has never done anything to otiend me ; it would really annoy me to 



THE BARRACK ROOM. 13 

say anything- against you — stop, I know what I'll do — I'll not give 
any reason — I shall merely say that I reject you. 

Fek. {affecting indifference). Just as you please — word it your own 
way. 

Clar. (aside). I really think he might have seemed pleased at that. 
{writes.) 

Frr. (aside). It's all over — well, it's lucky I had not time to fall in 
love with her. 

Clar. (aside). I declare, he's a good-looking man — poor fellow ! 

Fer. Well, is the letter finished ? 

Clar. (rising). Yes — here it is, you will send it. 

Fer. I will deliver it myself, (as he takes the letter) What a pretty 
little hand ! 

Clar. (suddenly). Oh, dear me, what shall I do ? 

Fer. What is the matter ? 

Clar. It has just occurred to me, that if that letter is delivered, it 
may place my father in difficulty — he may be again exiled. 

Fer. That, indeed, is very jjossible. 

Clar. You think so ? 

Fer. It is impossible to answer for the consequences. 

Clar. And he told me this morning, it would kill him to return 
to exile. What are you about ? 

Fer. (tearing the letter). I shall write a letter myself. 

Clar. You ! what do you mean ? 

Fer. Yes, if you will allow me, /will now write : to preserve my 
rank, you generously undertook the task ; but I will now save you 
and your father — I will now reject you. (goes to table l.) 

Clar. Oh, delightful ! then papa and I shall get into no trouble. 
Oh, stop, though, that will never do — you must not sacrifice your 
rank, an i incur the emperor's anger. 

Fer. I caimot flatter myself that you would regret it. 

Clar. Why — you see — the — the — injustice would be so great — I 
cannot allow it. (snatching thex>en.) 

Fer. Something must be done, the time has almost expired, and 
the emperor himself will expect us — a carriage is to be sent for 
you. 

Clar. Can you suggest any plan ? I really am so nervous, I can't 
tell what to do. 

Fer. There is but one way. 

Clar. Name it. 

Fer. Obedience to orders. 

Clar. Indeed 1 it is easy for you to say so — obedience to orders is 
your profession. 

Fer. True — I scarcely know what to say. At first, I could have 
left you without a pang : but after this interview, thrown together, 
as we have been, under circumstances so novel, I feel as if I had 
known you long, and to part from you for ever is most painful. 

Clar. (aside). Poor young man ! 

Fer. J, however, know my duty; I will acknowledge to the 
emperor that I love you, but at the same time I will^ reject you. 
He may deprive me of my rank, and send me forth in disgrace ; but 
I will fight with other armies, and either win other laurels or perish! 

Clar. (aside). Oh, how very sad. I never was so puzzled ! 

Ent^r Batiste, l. c. 



14 THE BARRACK ROOM. 

Bat. The imperial carriage is at the gate. 

Clar, Already ! 

Fer. The hour is passed ; I must begone. 

Clar. {agitated). Wait — one moment — you shall not be sacrificed. 

Fer. Speak ! 

Clar. Let the contract be ratified, — it is but a mere formality ; I 
will consent to go with you to the emperor, and I will kneel at his 
feet. 

Fer. Will you do this ? 

Clar. Yes, yes — anything is better than exciting his immediate 
anger. I will watch my opportunity — I will ask for time to know 
you — to study you — perhaps, to love you. 

Fer. Indeed ! 

Clar. Yes — only to gain time, you know ; I can afterwards 
decide on some plan. Ah, my father ! 

Enter Marquis and Valmont, r. d. 

Marq, Clarisse, my child, have you seen him ? {sees Ferrier) 
Your most obedient, sir. {aside) I suppose this is my son-in-law, 
whether I will or no. {aloud) What is your decision, Clarisse ? we 
must come to a decision, you know, and really, as life's a blessing, 
if you'll take a father's advice, you 

Fer. Your daughter has determined to accompany me to the 
court — the carriages are here, sir ; your relatives will of course go 
with us. Pray lead the waj^ Marquis. 

Clar. (to Marquis). Is this all arranged with your sanction, sir? 
without it, I cannot consent to go, and surely you never will permit 
it. 

Marq. No, my dear, certainly not — it's a thing totally out of the 
question?. 

Clar. You hear — my father says, it's totally out of the question. 

Val. (l.). Is that your decision. Marquis ? 

Marq, (r. c). Irrevocably ! there are certain preliminary arrange- 
ments which are indispensable, and I cannot allow my daughter to 
accompany 

Yll. {holding up list). Then your company will be required else- 
where — this list ! 

Marq. Oh, that unfortunate list ! we must comply, Clarisse. 

Fer. (l c). You hear, madam — come, trust everything to me, 

Clar. (c, giving her hand — to Marquis). If it must be so ; but I 
cannot go without you, sir ! 

Marq. I, my dear, why should I go ? I've a hundred reasons 

Val. Shall I show you a list of them ? 

Marq. Oh, I'm a devoted creature— I obey. [Exeunt, c. 

Clakisse on (lie arm of the Marquis ; YALMONTancZ F'et&rie.u follow 
arm-in-arm. 

CURTAIN FALLS ON THE MOVEMENT. 



THE BAIIRACK KOOM. 15 



ACT II. 

^CE^'E.—The harracTc-room ^/Colonel Fetirier, furnislied for a 
bachelor; a recess loUli a led in r. c, jlat ; a common wooden bench; 
a closet loith 'plates and coffee-pot, etc. ; a common table, with writing 
materials arid a pipe ; some arms ; a candle burning in a common 
candUstick ; a chair with a high back ; a door in Jlat r. ; another 
door L. j 

Enter Officers, c. ' 

A military quartette of tico stanzas'^— first* sung before curtain rises, 
second after. The scene may discover the group ; the crozod retire 
after tlie song ; Frst Officer and Ferrier remain. 

Fer. Yes, you may all wonder, but it's a fact, I assure you— I am 
a married man. 

First Officer. You said nothing about it when we met yester- 
day. 

Fer. I knew nothing about it when we met yesterday ; I have told 
you that everything was arranged for me ; I was not a free agent ; 
but had it been all of my own free will, I never could have chosen a 
lovelier wife. 

First Off, And where is she now ? 

Fer, I will tell you all, I am tormented to death ; one event has 
followed another so quickly, that I seem out of breath. At three I 
was before the mayor — at four the marriage was solemnized ; then 
followed the grand dinner ! In the evening there was a ball at my 
father-in-law's chateau. But the most extraordinary thing is yet to 
be told : in the middle of the ball, when I was gazing on my dear 
little wife, who was dancing like a sylph, an orderly sergeant put 
into my hands a paper, and I found myself commanded instantly to 
repair to my quarters. 

First Off. Without speaking to your bride ? 

Fer, Yes ; and when I arrived here I found orders had been given 
that no officer should on any account leave his quarters to-night. It 
is cruel— what will Clarisse think of me ? I'll not submit to it— I'll 
disobey the orders, and defy consequences, {cjoes rapidly to left, is met 
at door by Bernard, l. ) 

Ber, a dispatch for you. Colonel — to be delivered immediately, 

Fer, a dispatch— what do I see, a brevet ? Is it possible ? 
Brigadier-Gent ral and Commander of the Legion of Honor ! and oh, 
more welcome than all, lines addressed to me in the emperor's own 
hand — "My dear Ferrier, I have not forgotten Ulm and Austerlitz." 
Signed, "Napoleon ! " 

Ber, Now I am quite happy — it's all my doing— I taught him to 
hold up his head, and turn out his toes. Huzza 1 huzza ! 

Fer, And I was thinking of abandoning my post, and disobeying 
orders ! ungrateful that I am ; no doubt the emperor has his own 
good reasons for this seeming cruelty. It is a bore, though, on one's 
wedding-night ! Come, my friends, let us while away the time over 
a bowl of good punch ; the longest night must have an end, and to- 
morrow I shall be at liberty again — come, 

• [Exeunt Officers, r. c, d, 

• " Soldier's Farewell " by Kiicken. 



16 THE BARRACK ROOM. 

Ber. a General ! and the Legion of Honor ! and married to a 
great lady — all in one day ! such days are not often seen ; but why 
is he here drinking with his companions, when he ought to he at 
home with his wife ? I must speak to him about that, {a knock at tlie 
dom\ L.) Who can be there at this hour, I wonder ? {goes and opens 
door. 

Enter Clarisse wiih Valmont, with a rich pelisse over her hall 

dress, l. 

Val. Here, madam, you will consider yourself at home, 

Ber. {aside, r.). Oh, oh ! it's all understood between them, I sup- 
pose, {passes to r. in f.) 

Clar. (c. , starts at seeing him). Who is this ? 

Ber. Your husband's faithful attendant, madam. You are wel- 
come. 

Val. My duty, madam, ends here — your most obedient. 

\boics and exit, l. 

Clar. Oh, dear me, I don't like this at all— left alone with this 
strange man, in this strange place ! {to Bernard) Well, sir, since 
I am left here, I beg you will conduct me to my husband immedi- 
ately. 

Ber. Conduct you to your husband, madam ? 

Clar. Yes ; where is he ? 

Ber. {aside). It will never do to say he's drinking punch with the 
oflScers. {aloud) He's at his post. 

Clar, Well, and where is that ? 

Ber. (fighting a cigar). With the commandant. 

Clar. And where is the commandant ? 

Ber. {puffing). Oh, he's at /«*« post. 

Clap.. Oh, dear me, and where is that ? 

Ber. Close by — but, you see, military discipline must not be in- 
terrupted. 

Clar. Well, then, take me to my husband's apartments — this is a 
horrid place ! such a smell of smoke and spirits, oh, shocking ! I 
came here because my father, and the aide-de-camp, and everybody 
else said I must. I have not had my own way one moment this day, 
but now I insist on leaving this dirty den, and being taken to the 
colonel's apartments, 

Ber. How your tongue does march and countermarch, all to no 
purpose ! Now just sit down snug in that great chair ? The colo- 
nel's apartments, indeed I look about you and admu'e — these are the 
colonel's apartments. 

Clar. These ! nonsense — you are jesting. 

Ber. Jesting 1 Come, I like that f what more would you have ? 
Did you not observe the corridor as you entered ? {opens cupboard in 
which is a cold fold and a bottle of wine) That's the dining-room, {open- 
ing curtains of recess) That's the bedchamber, {points to bench) That's 
the ottoman, {pointing to great chair) That's the lady's boudoir — 
and you'd better take possession— a pleasant and commodious suite, 
is it not ? 

Clar. I must be dreaming ! {a great noise without — singing and 
laughing) What can that mean ? 

Ber. Oh, nothing uncommon— sometimes it goes on all night. 

Clar. Then where am I ? 



THE BARRACK ROOM. 17 

Ber. Where are you ! where every good woman ought to be— in 
your own husband's barraek-room. 

Olar. Barrack-room ! /in a barrack-room? {more iwise witJwut, 
glasses jingling, singing and laughing.) 

Fer. {witJiout). Another glass— another song— hip, hip, hip, 
huzza ! 

Clar. My husband's voice ! oh, miserable woman that I am ! I 
shall die of vexation. Leave the room, sir, I desire you — I can't 
bear the smell of your pipe, 

Ber. Pipe, ma'am — it's not a pipe — a best Sardinia ! 

Clar. The smell of your tobacco will be the death of me I 

Ber. Law, it's a perfect nosegay ! but if you don't like it, I'll 
smoke it outside the door, certainly. But if you'd only try a cigar 
yourself, you'd like it amazingly. I thought ladies liked sweet puffs. 

[Exit, L. 

Clar. I am abused— betrayed— sacrificed ! What a fool I have 
been, tamely to acquiesce in such an arrangement ! yet he won my 
good opinion this morning by his gentle manners, and his noble con- 
duct ; how could I be so deceived ? what shall I do ? the cairiage 
that brought me here must be gone ; escape is impossible ; but I will 
write instantly to my father, and entreat liira to come to my rescue. 
{seats herself in great chair, l. , icith her hack to the door, and writes) ' ' My 
dear papa — I entreat you to come and take me away from this horrid 
place ; we have been deceived, imposed upon ; I am doomed to bo 
the wife of a low-born, low-bred soldier ; 1 actually loathe him, and I 
write this to you in a room smelling of tobacco, and where I can 
hear him carousing with his dissolute companions. Come, then, 
dearest papa, and deliver your affectionate 

"Clarisse." 
Heigho ! and I have actually lived to find myself in a soldier's bar- 
rack-room ! There's no help f(jr it, however, and here I must re- 
main until my father comes to fetch me. {half folds it) But how 
shall I send it ? Oh, dear, I forgot that ; I wish I had not sent away 
that dreadful smoking man ! — what a day of fatigue and excitement 
I have endured ! I can scarcely sit up — but I must not go to sleep 
— no, no, impossible ! {leaves letter half folded — gradually falls asleep) 

Enter Ferrier, d. in f., speaking as he enters. 

Fer. Good night, Captain — good night, George — good night, all 
of you. If it had not been for the society of those merry fellows, how 
should I ever have got through the last two hours ; and yet they must 
be laughing at me, shut up here on my wedding-night ! Hang it, I'll 
read over my brevet once more to clieer me, and then I'll try and go 
to sleep in my arm-chair, {/akes out the brevet) Ah, there it is, I almost 
feared it was a dream ; this right must have an end, and to-morrow 
I'll fly to Clarisse and— ha ! what do I see — my wife, my dear Clarisse ! 
Now, indeed, I am happy; she has sought me in my barrack-room; 
she, who has been all her life accustomed to luxury and refinement, 
whose eyes have rested on the richest furniture, and whose feet have 
pressed the softest carpets— and what pretty little feet they are!— I'll 
wake her with a \i\^'^ \ {stoops forv^ard — sees tlie letter she has written, 
takes it up, and at the same time throws down his brevet on the table) To 
her father 1 what can she have to say to him ? — shall I read it ? — yes, 
yes, she f^aw her father not two hours ago ; she must require some- 
thing and I can provide it ere she wakes, {takes it up and read^) " I 



18 THE BAKRACK ROOM. 

entreat you to come — take me away — deceived — imposed upon — the 
wife of a low-born, low-bred soldier! I actually loath him" — Loath 
him! — I can read no more; alas! alas ! there ends my dream of love 
and hope— fool that I was ! how could I hope that a soldier of fortune 
could ever win the heart of one of noble birth ? {he icalks about the 
room in despair — acddenially throics aside a chair — Clarisse wakes.) 

Clar. Where am I ? youli^xQl (Ferrieb, icithout replying , shores 
Tier the letter — aside) My letter ! he has read it — it's not very compli- 
mentary — no matter, it will spare me all explanations. 

Fer. I will myself be the bearer of this letter. 

Clar. You I 

Fer, But ere I take it, let me ask why you sought the dwelling of 
one so odious to you ? 

Clar. Sought it ! — don't suppose I sought it. I did not know 
whither they were taking me . I should be very sorry if you supposed 
I sought it. 

Fer. You wish to leave me, then — and you shall be gratified ! — 
we part and forever. 

Clar. Certaioly, sir, we must part — but — but there is no necessity 
for ill-will on either side — and when you say forever, I 

Fer, You coincide in the decision ; I know it. 

Clar. Oh I certainly — it is not for me to object. 

Fer. {coldly). I thank you, at all events, for your sincerity ; if such 
a blow was destined for me, the sooner it fell the better. Believe me, 
madam, I would myself conduct you to your father, did not my duty 
detain me here — your note shall, however, be forwarded, {crosses to 
c.) 

Clar. Of course— but — but — one word before you send it — those 
offensive words — allow me to apologize for them — I was wrong. 

Fer. In wishing your father to take you hence ? 

Clar. No— no, sir— no— of course not — but I regret having used 
expressions personally rude to jon. 

Fer. I did not accuse you: it is natural that one brought up as you 
have been, should feel contempt for one who is, as you say, "a low- 
bred soldier ! " 

Clar. {aside). I'm sorry I wrote that letter ; he's too kind, too 
gentle, to reproach me. 

Fer. You may still be happy, madam ; and for your sake I am 
willing to sacrifice my own prospect of happiness. By the new law 
of divorce we have but to unite in a petition for an eternal separa- 
tion, and I doubt not we shall obtain it. 

Clar. {aside). How precipitate some people are in their decisions ! 
If he had humored me a little I might very likely have come round ; 
but it's nmch better as it is — much better. He's good looking, cer- 
tainly, and amiable, and gentlemanlike ; but then it's not at all the 
sort of match for me. 

Fer. You do not reply,' madam ? 

Clar. {pettishly). Reply, sir ? to what, sir — to what, pray ? 

Fer. I suggested an eternal separation. 

Clar. {crying). Of course you know very well that is what I want. 
I am so vexed I don't know what to do. 

Enter Bernard, c. ; looks from or^ to the other. 

I don't know why I'm crying ; {exit Bernard, f^oftly) I'm sure there's 



THE BAimACK ROOM. 19 

nothing to cry about ; I ought to treat it with the — the — the greatest 
un — un — unconcern, {a knock at the door.) 
Fer. Come in. 

Re-enter Bernard, c. ; salutes. 

Fer. "What do you want ? 

]3er. The commandant wishes to see you. 

Fer. I attend him. {goes uj) to Clarisse) Dare I ask your hand ? 
I claim not the husband's privilege — a kiss — tliougli no husband ever 
loved more fondly, {presses her hand and exit, c. Clarisse sits down 
in arm-chair.) 

Ber. Here's a happy couple. Qighfs Ms cigar.) 

Clar. What are you about ? did I not tell you I could not bear 
smoking ? I Insist on your not smoking here. 

Ber. {aside). Hey-dey ! — she'll never do for us. {aloud) Law, miss ! 

Clar. Don't call me miss ; I wont be called miss. 

Ber. Oh, I forgot ; you're the Colonel's lady ! Well, Mrs. Colonel 
Ferrier 1 

Clar. Ferrier ! I'll not be called Mrs. Colonel Ferrier ; do you 
mean to insult me ? 

Ber. You want something to quiet what the ladies call their 
nerves. You're somewhat hysterical ; take a cigar, do, it will do 
you good, {gives her a cigar, she throws it at him.) 

Clar. Leave the room instantly. 

Ber. {aside). Well, this I will say, I'm very glad they didn't make 
me marry her. {^Exit, l. 

Clar. {sits down). A divorce ! He is quite right, we must have a 
divorce. How agitated he seemed ! Poor fellow ! I do believe he's 
getting very fond of me. It w^as very w^ong of me to abuse him in 
that letter. Here it is ; I'm sorry I wrote it. {takes up the brevet and 
looks at it) What is this ? a brevet ! General Ferrier with the Legion 
of Honor— and a complimentary letter signed by the emperor !— how 
very flattering ; other people do not seem to think him so contempt- 
ible, and if we had but loved each other, the match, after all, might 
not have been so bad. He must have distinguished himsel f very much 
to have gained these honors. What service he must have seen ! and 
what hardships ! Poor fellow, he deserves a happy home. How I 
should like to know his history ; that old soldier has lived with him 
a long time ; I'll call him in and question him. {goes to the door) Are 
you there ? Come in, will you, I want to talk to you. 

Enter Bernard, l. 

Ber. Tome ? {aisde) How civilly she speaks. 

Clar, Yes, come here. 

Ber. Stop, I must throw away my cigar. 
_ Clar. ISo, no — I wish to get accustomed to it ! I think I rather 
like it — it's very refreshing ! 

Ber. Ah, now, that's sensible ; {puffs out a deal of smoke) isn't it 
pleasant ? 

Clar. {coughs). Oh, yes, delightful ! but I want to ask you a few 
questions, and you can't talk with that delicious thing in your mouth. 
Have you known the Colonel — I mean General Ferrier — have you 
known him long ? 

Ber. Ever since he was a little boy, so high. 

Clar. Then you know who he was, I suppose ? 



20 THE BARRACK ROOM. 

Beti. Oh, yes ; he makes no secret of it, so why should I ? indeed, 
he ought to be proud of it ; he was nobody's son, you know. 

Clar. Indeed ! 

Ber. Don't mistake me, ma'am ; he'd a father and mother, and 
all right like other folks ; but they were nobodies, like me, you 
know. His father was killed in battle, close to my elbow, and after 
the fight I saw the little boy sitting on a gun crying and wiping his 
eyes on a bit of a banner. 

Clar. Poor dear little boy ! 

Ber. I took him home and nursed him, and though I was ignor- 
ant myself, I had him taught all I could manage to pay for ; and 
when he was old enough he became a soldier like myself, and he 
rose— and he rose — and he soon left me behind ; and at last he got 
to be a captain. 

Clar. How proud you must have felt ! 

Ber. Yes, that was my weak point ; but he wasn't proud, though ; 
he never looked down on me, but loved me just as he used to do 
when he sat upon my knee a curly-pated boy. 

Clar. Oh, how good of him ! I love him for that. 

Ber. But he wasn't content with being captain, and once he dis- 
tinguished himself more than ever in a great battle. 

Clar. Yes, yes ; I know — Austerlitz. 

Ber. Vv"hy, how did you know that ? 

Clar. No matter — go on. 

Ber. I like to talk to you about it, you listen with such interest. 
Stop, I'll tell you all about it. I saw it— I saw it ! 

Clar. {with great interest). Sit down in that great chair. 

Ber. But I can't sit in your presence. 

Clar. Yes, yes, I'll sit on this little stool. Now for it. {makes 
Bernard sit in the chair. ) 

Ber. Well, now, I'll tell you the whole story. You see here is 
the field, and we were advancing this way. Now you'll be the ene- 
my 

Clar. No, I iront be the enem}'. 

Ber. Then I'll be the enemy. 

Clar. No, no ; 3'ou sha'n't be the enemy — the Colonel's enemy ! 
— no ! 

Ber. Well, then, the candle must be the enemy. 

Clar. Very well, then, the candle. 

Ber. Now, as I said, we were advancing this way ; our regiment 
— that's the famous old twenty-first — was on the right. Well, just 
as we came out from under a hill, a battery — there, the inkstand's the 
battery — opened a terrible fire upon our flank. In a little while we 
saw an officer ride up and speak to our colonel, and the colonel called 
out, "Twenty-first! we're ordered to take those guns. Head of col- 
umn to the right, and forward ! The emperor sees you ! " Well, 
we turned and went for the guns. Our brave old colonel led us on 
foot. But, my dear, as we came near the battery the whole head of 
our column was swept away. Our colonel was killed, our color- 
sergeant was shot down, and oh ! it looked for a moment as if we 
were going to stop. But at that mompnt Captain Ferrier — my boy 
Terrier ! — sprang forward, caught up the colors out of the dead ser- 
geant's hands, and dashed right up on the redoubt, {spi-ings to his feet) 
Oh ! you should have seen "him ! — you should have seen him as he 
led us into the fire. Be sure we swept after him, shouting Victory ! 
Victory ! Vic-*—- 



THE BARRACK ROOJf. 21 

Clarisse springs to her feet, waving her handkerchief and shouting 
victory with Bernard. Ferrier enters d. in f. Bernard see- 
ing him, stops suddenly, tui'ns and exit l, Ferrier 2^asses to close 
door L. by which Bernard goes out, and comen forward l. Clar- 
isse, seeing Ferrier, passes rapidly to r. in great confudon, 

Fer. (l.). I trust I do not intrude, madam ? 

Clar. (^embarrassed). Certainly not, sir. {aside) What will he think 
of me ? 

Fer. (aside). I certainly was not expected. 

Clar. Has my letter gone ? 

Fer. It has, madam ; I attended to your wishes instantly, for I 
shall soon be too far distant to have the satisfaction of obeying you. 
I am ordered on foreign service, and must depart at daybreak. 

Clar. At daybreak ! 

Fer. Even so, madam ; and as we may never again have an op- 
portunity of conversing together, I trust you will listen to me with 
patience for a few moments. 

Clar. (aside). Oh, dear ! I never shall be able to listen calmly. 

Fer. I have been reconsidering the prudence of a divorce. 

Clar. Oh, don't talk of that i 

Fer. For your s;.ke, madam— not for my own — I Vv^ould urge 3'ou 
to reliiKjuish the idea. 

Clar. Yes, yes ! go on. 

Fer. The publicity of a divorce may subject you to the malignity 
of slander ; the cause may be misrepresentt'd, and one so beautiful 
and young can never be too cautious. I am going far away, madam, 
and will promise never to return. My presence shall never annoy 
you more ; the v/orld shall consider our separation unavoidable ; we 
alone shall know that it is voluntary — and — and eternal, 

Clar. Eternal ! 

Fer. I shall always speak of you with the greatest respect — nay, 
with the greatest affection. 

Clar. Shall you ?— shall you indeed ! 

Fer. Yes ; for I shall speak as I must ever feel ; and, in return, 
let me solicit your forbearance. When you speak of me, do not avow 
your hatred. 

Clar, Hatred ! 

Fer. It may happen, that at some fete or festival, where you are 
the gayest and the loveliest, you may hear the tidings of a battle won ; 
Fhould I survive, I trust the name of Ferrier may then be honorably 
mentioned, and I would have you smile as if you shared my glory. 

Clar. (aside). I cannot answer him. 

Fer. Or it may happen that they will tell you General Ferrier is 
dead. 

Clar. (starts and covers her face). Dead ! 

Fer. Then I would have you cover your face as yon do now, that 
those around j^ou may imagine I did not fall unmourned by her who 
was to nie so dear. 

Clar. (crying bitterly). Ko ; T won't hide my face. Why should 
I ? I'll not be ashamed to let the whole world see my tears. 

Fer. Tears 1 

Clar. Oh, don't notice them ; I cannot restrain them. You are 
going to leave me, and I know you will never forgive me. That 
horrid, ungrateful letter ! how I wish I could recall it. 



22 THE BARRACK ROOM. 

Fer. Its purport is easily recalled. Dearest Clarisse, the Marquis 
is here to take you hence ; say that you will not leave me. 
Clar. Leave you ! never ! Where is he ? 

Enter Marquis, l. 

My dear father, forget that foolish letter I sent you. 

Marq. How very changeable women are ! as I am chamberlain, 
and neither wish to lose so excellent a situation, nor return into exile, 
I do hope, my dear, you'll try to tolerate the husband selected for 
you by the higher powers. You've no idea how married people learn 
to tolerate ono another. 

Clar. It shall be the study of my life to prove myself deserving of 
that husband's love. And must you really go at daybreak ? 

!Marq. (ancle). Oh ! if he goes at daybreak, it can't much signify. 

Fer. You wish me to remain ; then it will be indeed painful to 
depart so soon. 

Enter Bernard, l., and gives pa-per. 

Ber. Another order. General — no end to them this day, I think, 

Fer. {reads). And one that is most welcome ; our departure is 
postponed ! Come, then, dearest Clarisse, forget the discomforts of 
my barrack-room in the chateau prepared for my bride. 

3Iarq. a change for the better, certainly. I never saw such a 
den I it puts me in mind of a prison. Hem ! {aside) I hope never to 
see one. 

Clar. Splendid as the chateau may be, I shall always cherish the 
recollection of The Barrack Room. 

CURTAIN. 



STAGE DIRECTIONS. 



R. means Right of stage, facing the Audience ; L. Left ; C. Centre ; R. C. Right 
of Centre ; L. C. Left of Centre. D. F. Door in Flat, or Scene running across 
the back of the stage; C. D. F. Centre Door in the Flat; R. D. F. Right door in 
the Flat ; L. D. F. Left Door in the Flat ; R. D. Right Door ; L. D. Left Door ; 
1 E. First entrance ; 2 E. Second entrance ; U. E. Upper Entrance ; 1, 2 or 3 G. 
First. Second or Third Grooves. 

R. R. C. C. L. C. L. 

1^" The reader is supposed to be upon the stage, facing the audience. 



DE TVITT'S 

ETHIOPIAN AND COMIC DRAMA. 



" Let those langh now who never laughed before, 
And those who always laughed now laugh the more." 

Nothing so thorough and complete in the way of Ethiopian and Comic DramaJ 
^sj» e-ver been printed as those that appear in the following list. Not only are thJ 
ty'iots excellent, the characters droll, the incidents funny, the language humorous.! 
[but afi the situations, by-play, positions, pantomimic business, scenery, and tricks 
'are sq plainly set down and clearly explained, that the merest novice could put 
any of tuem on the stage. Included in this catalogue are all the most laughable 
and effective pieces of their class ever produced. 

^** In ordering, please copy the figures at the commencement of each play, 
which indicate the number of the piece in " De Witt's Ethiopian and Comio 
Drama." 

f^" Any of the following plays sent, postage free, on receipt of price— 
15 Cents Each. Address, 

J :. ' ' ' . DE WITT, 

JVb. 33 Rose Street, J^ew York. 



The figures In the columns indicate the number of characters — M. mah,. 



T. female. 



No. 
73. 
107. 

43. 






41. 
12. 
53. 

63. 
im. 

111. 

50. 



M. F. 

African Box, b\irlesqne, 2 scene 5 
Africanus Bluebeard, musical 

Ethiopian burlesque 6 2 

Baby Elephant, sketch, 9, scene 7 1 
Barncy> Courtship, musical 

interlude, 1 act 1 1 

Bad Whiskey, sketch, 1 scene. 2 1 
Black Caap from Whitechapel, 

negro piece 4 

Black Chemist, sketch, 1 scene 3 
Black-ey'd William, sketch, 2 

scenes 4 1 

Big Mistake, sketch, 1 scene.. 4 

Bogus Indian, sketch, 4 scenes 5 2 
Bogus Talking Machines (The) 

farce, 1 scene 4 

Bruised and Cured, sketch, 1 

scene 2 

Charge of the Hash Brigade, 

Irish musical sketch 2 2 

Coal Heaver's Revenge, negro 

sketch, 1 scene 6 

Cremation, sketch, 2 scenes... 8 1 

Daguerreotypes, sketch, 1 scene 3 
Doinon and Pythias, burlesque, 

2 scenes 5 1 

Darkey's Stratagenv, 1 act — 3 1 
De Black Magician, Ethiopian 

comicality. 1 scene 4 2 

Deeds of Darkness, Ethiopiati 

extravaganza. 1 act 6 1 

Draft (The), sketch, 1 act 6 

Dutchman's Ghcst, 1 scone ... 4 1 



No. 
95. 
67. 
4. 

98. 
52. 



106. 



Dutch Justiee, sketch, 1 scene 11 
Editor's Troubles, farce, 1 Rce. 6 

Eh ? What is It ? sketch 4 

Elopement (The), farce, 1 scene 4 
Excise Trials, sketch, 1 scene. 10 
Fellow that Looks Like Me, in- 

terhide, 1 scene 2 

Fisherman's Luck, 1 scene 2 

First Night (The), Dutch farce, 

1 act 4 

Gambrinus, Kmg of Lager 

Beer, Ethiopian burlesque 2 

scenes 8 

German Emigrant (The), sketch 

1 scene 2 

Getting Square on the Call Boy, 

sketch, 1 scene 3 

Ghost (The), sketch, 1 act 2 

Ghost in a Pawnshop, 1 scene. 4 

Gljxerine Oil, sketch 3 

Going for the Cup. interlude. . 4 
Good Night's Rest, 1 scene. .. 3 
Gripsack, sketch, 1 scene 



86, . . 

70. Guide to the Stage, sketch 3 

61 
23 



Happy Couple, 1 scene . 
Hard Times, 



extravaganza, 1 

scene 5 

3. Hemmed In, sketch 3 

48. High Jack, the Heeler, 1 scen^ 6 

68. Hippotheatron. sketch 9 

71. In and Out, sketch, 1 scene... 2 

33. Jeiilous Husband, sketch 2 

94. Julius, the Snoozer, 3 Bcenes.. 7 



DJ! WITT'S ETHIOFIAN AlTD COIIIC DEAMA' (Gontiimed). 



Wo. 
103. 



: 18. 

60, 
S7. 

, 90. 

109. 

I 19. 



•101 

' 8. 
44. 
49. 

23. 

27. 

SO. 

7G. 
87. 



105. 
55. 



1 15. 
59. 
80. 

21. 
84. 

88. 
74. 
46. 
C9. 
56. 
72. 

7. 

13. 

16. 

47. 

54. 
100. 
102. 

ai. 

2. 

104. 
5. 
28. 
62. 



31. "P. 

Katrina's Little Game, Dutch 

act, 1 scene 1 2 

Last of the Mohicans, sketch.. 3 1 

Laughing Gas, sketch, 1 scene. 6 1 

Live Injun, sketch, 4 scenes. .. 4 1 

Lost Will, sketch 4 G 

Lucky Job, farce, 2 scenes.... 3 2 

Lunatic (The), farce, 1 scene.. 3 

Maldng a Hit, farce, 2 scenes.. 4 

Malicious Trespass, 1 scene.... 3 
Midnight Intruder (The), farce, 

1 scene 6 1 

. Molhe Moriarty, Irish music- 
al sketch, 1 scene 1 1 

Mutton Trial, sketch, 2 scenes 4 

Musical Servant, sketch, 1 see. 3 
Night in a Strange Hotel, 

sketch, 1 scene 2 

Obeying Orders, sketch 1 scene 2 1 
One Hundredth Night of Ham- 
let, sketch 7 1 

One Night hi a Barroom, 

sketch 7 

One, Two, Three, 1 scene 7 

Pete and the Peddler, Negi-o 

and Irish sketch, 1 scene 2 1 

Policy Players, sketch, 1 scene 7 
Pompey's Patients, interlude, 

2 scenes 6 

Porter's Troubles, 1 scene 6 1 

Port Wine vs. Jealousy, sketch 2 1 
Painter's Apprentice (The), 

farce, 1 scene 5 C 

Polar Bear (The), 1 scene 4 1 

Recruiting Office, sketch, 1 act. 5 
Remittance from Home, 

sketch, 1 scene G 

Rehearsal (The), Irish farce, 2 

scenes 4 2 

Rigging a Purchase, sketch, 1 

scene 3 

Rival Artists, sketch, 1 scene. 3 

Rival Tenants, sketch 4 

Sam's Courtship, farce, 1 act.. 2 1 

Sausage Makers, 2 scenes 6 1 

Scenes on the Mississippi, 

2 scenes 6 

Scampini, pantomime, 2 scenes 6 3 

Serenade(The), sketch,2 scenes 7 

Siamese Twins, 2 scenes 5 

Sleep Walker, sketch, 2 scenes 3 

Slippery Day, sketch, 1 scene. 6 1 

Squire for a Day, sketch 5 1 

Stage-struck Couple, 1 scene.. 2 1 

Stranger, burlesque, 1 scene... 1 2 

and 2 children. 

Stupid Servant, sketch, 1 scene 2 

Streets of New York, 1 scene . 6 

Storming the Fort, 1 scene 5 

Take it. Don't Take It, 1 scene 2 

Them Papers, sketch, 1 scene. 3 
Three Chiefs (The), 2 scenes ..60 

Three A. M., sketch, 2 scenes. 3 1 
Three Strings to One Bow, 

sketch, 1 scene 4 1 

Tricks, sketch 5 2 

Two Awfnls (The), 1 scene.... 5 

Two Black Roses, sketch 4 1 

Uncle Eph's Dream, 2 scenes.. 8 1 

Yinegar Bitters, sketch, 1 scene 6 1 

VVukc Up, William lieury . ... 3 W ) 



No. M. p. 

so. Y/anted, a Nurse, 1 scene 4 

75. Weston the Walkist, Dutch 

sketch, 1 scene 7 1 

93. What Shall I Take ? farce, 1 act 8 1 

29. Who Died First ? 1 scene 3 1 

97. Who's the Actor ? farce, 1 

scene 4 

99. Wrong Woman iu the Right 

Place, sketch, 2 scenes ... 2 2 

85. Young Scamp, sketch, 1 scene. 3 (?; 

112. The Coming Man, sketch, 1 act 3 ii 

113. Ambition, farce, 2 scenes 7 U' 

114. One Night in a Medical College, 
pketch, 1 scene 7 ) 

115. Private Boarding, comedy, 1 
scene 5 t 

116. Zacharias' Funeral, farce, 1 
scene 5 

117. Motor Bellows, comedy, 1 scene .^^ 

118. H'jl'^n's Funny Babies, bur- 
lesques 6 Q 

119. My V/ife's Visitors, comic 
drama, 1 tcene 6 1 

120. Body Snatchers (The), Negro 
sketch, ti scenes 3 1 

121. Stocks rjp» Stocks Down I 
Negro fare?, 1 scene J 

122. Ticket Taker, Negro farce, 1^ 
scene *? 

123. The Intelligence Office, Ethio- 
pian .sketch, .k scene f ] 

124. Deaf as a Fo»*:, Ethiopian 
' sketcli. 1 scone f G 

125. Oh, Hush ! Neg-o Operatic 
Olio, 3 scenes i 1 

126. Black Statue, Nejrro farce, 1 
scene ...4 t 

127- Blinks and Jinka EthiopJau 

sketch, 1 scene. . . 9 \ 



DE WITT'S ACTING PLAYS (Continued). 



No. 

144. 
34. 

137. 
111. 
119. 
165. 

48. 

32. 
164. 
109. 

85. 

87. 
143. 
189. 
163. 
154. 

63. 



15. 
46. 
il. 

184. 
108. 
|88. 
169. 
130. 
92. 
193. 

140. 

115. 
2. 

57. 
l(rt. 
112. 
185. 

84. 
117. 

171. 
14. 

m. 

176. 
90. 
170. 



97. 



172, 
94. 
45. 

155. 

178. 

147. 

156, 
82, 
12?. 



Laacashire Lass, melodrama, 5 acts. 12 
Larkins' Love Letters, farce, 1 act.. 3 

L' Article 47, drama, 3 acts 11 

Liar (The), comedy, 2 acts 7 

Life Chase, drama, 5 acts 14 

Living Statue (The), farce, 1 act 3 

Little Annie's Birthday, farce, 1 act. 2 

Little Rebel, farce, 1 act 4 

Little Ruby, drama, 3 acts 6 

Locked In, comedietta, 1 act 2 

Locked In with u Lady, sketch, 1 act. 1 

Locked Out, comic scene 1 

Lodgers an i Dodgers, farce, 1 act. . 4 
Leap Year, musical duality, 2 act. . . 1 

Marcoretti, drama, 3 acts 10 

Maria and Magdaleiva, play, 4 acts . 8 
Marriage at Any Price, farce, 1 act . 5 
Master Jones' Birthday, farce, 1 act. 4 

Maud's Peril, drama, 4 acts 5 

Midnight Watch, drama, 1 act 8 

Milky White, drama, 2 acts 4 

Miriam's Crime, drama, 3 acts 5 

Model of a Wife, farce, 1 act 3 

Money, comedy, 5 acts 17 

Mr. Scroggins, farce, 1 act o . 3 

Mr. x!., farce, i act 3 

My Uncle's Suit, farce, 1 act 4 

My Wife's Diary, farce, 1 act 3 

My Wife's Out, farce, 1 act. 2 

My Walking PhotOeiraph, musical 

duality, 1 act 1 

Never Reckon Your Chickens, etc., 

farce, 1 act 3 

New^ Men and Old Acres, comedy, 3 8 

Nobody's Child, drama, 3 acts 8 

Noemie, drama, 2 acts. 4 

No Name, drama, 5 acts 7 

Not a Bit Jealous, farce, 1 act . . . .' ? 
Not So Bad as We Seem, play, 5 acts. 14 

Not Guilty, drama, 4 acts 10 

Not Such a Fool as He Looks, drama, 

3 acts 5 

NoJhing Like Paste, farce, 1 act S 

No Thoroughfare, drama, 5 acts and 

prologue 13 

Off the Stage, comedietta, 1 act. ... 3 
On Bread and Water, farce, 1 act... 1 

Only a Halfpenny, farce, 1 act 2 

Only Somebody, farce, 1 act 4 

One too Many for Him, farce, 1 act. 2 

£100,000, comedy, 3 acts 8 

Orange Blossoms, comedietta, 1 act. 3 
Orange Girl, drama, in prologue 

and 3 acts 18 

Ours, comedy, 3 acts 6 

Our Clerks, farce, 1 act 7 

Our Domestics, comedy farce, 2 acts 6 
Our Heroes, military play. 5 acts. . .24 
Out at Sea, drama in prologue and 

4acts 16 

Overland Route, comedy, 3 acts 11 

Peace at Any Price, rarce, 1 act ... 1 1 

Peep o' Day, drama, 4 acts 12 4 

Peggy Green, far. e, 1 act 3 10 

Petticoat Parliament, extravaganza, 

in one act 15 24 

Photographic Fix, farce, 1 act 3 2 

A COMPLETE 



No. 
61. 
138. 



M. V. 



Plot and Passion, drama. 3 acts 7 

Poll and Partner Joe, burlesque, 1 

act 10 S 

110. Poppleton's Predicaments, farce, 13 1 

50. Porter's Knot, drama, 2 acta. . .....8 2 

59. Post Boy, drama, 2 acts 5 3 

95. Pretty liorse-Breaker, farce, 1 act.. 3 10 

181 and 182. Queen Mary, drama, 4 actB.38 8 

157. Quite at Home, comedietta, 1 act. . . 5 8 
196. Queerest Courtship (The), comic op 

eretta, 1 act 1 1 

132. Race for a Dinner, farce, 1 act 10 

183. Richelieu, play, 5 acts ...16 2 

38. Rightful Heir, drama, 5 acts 10 2 

77. Roll of the Drum, drama, 3 acts 8 4 

13. Ruy Bias, drama, 4 acts 12 4 

194. Rum, drama, 3 acts 7 4 

105. Rosemi Shell, travesty, 1 act, 4 

scenes 6 3 

158. School, comedy, 4 acts 6 6 

79. Sheep in Wolf's Clothing, drama, 17 5 

37. Silent Protector, farce, 1 act 3 2 

35. Silent Woman, farce, 1 act 2 1 

43. Sisterly Service, comedietta, 1 act. . 7 2 
6. Six Months Ago, comedietta, 1 act. 2 1 

10. Snapping Turtles, duologue, 1 act. . 1 1 

26. Society, comedy, 3 acts 16 5 

78. Op^cial Performances, farce, 1 act. . 7 3 
31. Taming a Tiger, farce, 1 act 3 

150. Tell-Tale Heart, comedietta, 1 act. . 1 2 

120. Tempest in a Teapot, comedy, 1 act. 2 1 
146. There's no Smoke Without Fire, 

comedietta, 1 act 1 2 

83. Thrice Married, personation piece, 

lact 6 1 

42. Time and the Hour, drama, 3 acts .73 

27. Time and Tide, drama, 8 act3 and 

prologue 7 5 

133. Timothy to the Rescue, farce, 1 act. 4 2 
153. 'Ti3 Better to Live than to Die, 

farce, 1 act 2 1 

134. Tompkins the Troubadour, farce, 13 2 
29. Turumg the Tables, farce, 1 act. ... 5 3 

168. Tvveedie's Rights, comedy, 2 acts.. 4 2 

126. Twice Killed, farce, 1 act 6 3 

56. Two Gay Deceivers, farce, 1 act 3 

123. Two Polts, farce, 1 act 4 4 

198. Twin Sisters (The), comic operetta, 

lact 3 1 

162. Uncle's Will, comedietta, 1 act 2 1 

106. Up for the Cattle Show, farce, 1 act. 6 2 
81. Vandyke Brown, farce, 1 act 3 3 

124. Volunteer Review, farce, 1 act 6 6 

91. Walpole, comedy, 3 acts 7 2 

118. Wanted, a Young Lady, farce, 1 act. 3 

44. War to the Knife, comedy, 3 acts. .54 
105. Which ofthe Two? comedietta, lact 2 10 

98. Who is Who? farce, 1 act 3 2 

12. Widow Hunt, comedy, 3 acts. 4 4 

5. William Tell with a Vengeance, 

burlesque 8 2 

136. Woman in Red, drama, 3 acts and 

proloffue 6 

161. Woman 8 Vows and Mason's Oaths, 

4acts 10 4 

11. Woodcock's Little Game, farce, 2 4 4 
54. Young Collegian (Cantab.), farce, 13 3 

DESCRIPTIVE CATALOGUE 



of DE W^ITT^S ACTING PLAYS AND PE "WITT^S 
ETHIOPIAN AND COMIC DRAMAS , containing Plot, Costume, Scenery, 
Timt of BepresentatioQ and every other informatioo, mailed free and post paid. 



LIBKHKY OH CONUREbb 



310 3 




The most complete and reliable Instruction Book in the Art of 
Negro Minstrelsy ever written. 



BDENT COBK; or, Tlie AiatBir MiiisM 

A most valuable Companion and Guide for the Young Amateur. 

By FRANK DUMONT, of the San Francisco Minstrels. 

I»RICE, as CENTS. 

This book contains every bit of information needed to thoroughly inform a 
young amateur upon all points ahout Burnt Cork Minstrel Entertainments, from 
the ringing up of the eurtain to the close of the performance. The work being 
the production of one of the best performers (and the best writer) on the Ethiopian 
Stage, Mr. Frank Dumont, is the most trustworthy book of its kind ever written. 
If any one wants to rival the Chrlstys, the Bryants, or the Campbells, who have 
glittered as the Wack Diamonds of the Darkey Drama of the past, or the Birch & 
Backus of the present day, this is the book that shows how it is done. It teaches 
how to get ready for the stage, and what to do and say before an audience. All the 
ins and outs are described— all the tricks and gags are given. If the yonng aspirant 
has any fun in him these pages show him how to bring it out. Full directions are 
given for managing Minstrel Shows and arranging Programmes. The Book also 
contains Gags, Conundrums, Stump Speeches, Comic Recitations, End Men's 
Talks, Finales for " first part " of Entertainment, and in addition, Six Complete 
Copyriglit Negro Fai'ces. 

A BOOK IN CONSTANT DEMAND. 

FILLS A VOID LONG FELT BOTH BY THE PROFESSION AND THE 
AMATEUR BLACK CORKIST. 

"BONES!" 

HIS GAGS AND STUMP SPEECHES; 

NIGGER AND DUTCH STORIES AND DIALOGUES; ''BROKEN CHINEE" 
DIALECT PIECES; AND QUEER CONUNDRUMS. 

PRICE, 15 CENTS. 



Among its contents will be found : 
GENUINE JDARKEY STUMP SPEECHES, hitting off all the vagaries 

of life. 
CONUNDRUMS that will set the whole continent guessing, and then they'll 

have to "give 'em up," half the time, 
DUTCH AND YANKEE STORIES that won't leave a button intact 

unless its tacked in by one of our steel wire stitching machines. 
GAGS FOR END MEV. The best lot of these funny questions and answers 

ever collerted. The MINSTREL, the SHOWMAN and the CIRCUS CLOWN 

will find here all they want to set the house in a rip-roarious roar. 

Dutchiest kind of 
DEITCHER STORIES AND DIALOGUES, 

NIGGER DIALOGUES, STORIES, ETC. 
Full of the comical unction so peculiar to the cachinnating contraband. 
it^~Every pa<,'e is stuffed full of the jolliest kind of fun. There's a hearty langh 
in every line. 
^,** Single copies sent, postage free, to any address in the United States or Canada, 
on receipt of])i'ice. 



